BUILDING YOUR MARITAL HOME PROPERLY
Hello, friends, welcome to today’s broadcast. I bless the LORD for your commitment to listen to these life-uplifting messages. Remember that the blessing is not attached to hearing only, but to do or practice what you hear. I pray that the transformation of your mind will lead to the rebranding of your character to fit the Kingdom of GOD lifestyle.
Today, I shall be speaking on, Building Your Marital Home Properly.
BUILDING YOUR MARITAL HOME PROPERLY
Our text will be from two portions of the bible: in the Book of Proverbs – first, Proverbs 24:3 and verse 4.
3 Through wisdom a house is built,
And by understanding it is established;
4 By knowledge the rooms are filled
With all precious and pleasant riches.
Secondly, we will be reading from Proverbs 14:1,
The wise woman builds her house,
But the foolish pulls it down with her hands.
Let us pray.
Heavenly FATHER, the FATHER of our LORD JESUS CHRIST, there are so many cracks in families today. This situation is precarious in building self-communities and maintaining peaceful homes. I pray that the message of today will catalyze the healing of homes and repair relationships in Christian homes…in JESUS Mighty Name. Amen!
No man or woman chooses to be foolish as one chooses a red or blue coat or grey or black coat. It is what one does: one’s lifestyle, speech and relationship that betray one and puts a label of foolishness or wise on the individual. No one actually will like to be classified as either foolish or wise. Our second passage says, The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one pulls it down with her hands. It is the same with a man. A wise man build his house, but a foolish man pulls it down with his hands.
In Matthew 7:24-27 our LORD JESUS told us of a parable of the wise and the foolish builders.
24 “Therefore whoever hears these sayings of Mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man who built his house on the rock: 25 and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it did not fall, for it was founded on the rock.
26 “But everyone who hears these sayings of Mine, and does not do them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand: 27 and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it fell. And great was its fall.”
The parable illustrates the importance of building one’s life on obedience to the teachings and examples of our LORD JESUS CHRIST. It illustrates the difference between those who hear and act upon what they learnt from JESUS and those who hear but do not act upon what they learn.
Friends, let me ask you: and think about it, are you a wise builder or a foolish builder? Are your actions the wise ones? Are you really building your home wisely? Let me introduce…or remind you of three commitments that will make you a wise builder.
Three commitments that will make you a wise builder:
- Commitment to closeness
After more than 3 and half decades of marriage, and having been refined in the fire, I am now in a position to offer biblical advice to both new and old families.
A study of the average length of marriages ending in divorce in the world’s greatest cities is educative and instructive. Some results are: in the City of Rome, 18 years; in the City of Paris in France, 13 years; New York, 12.2 years; Quarter, 5 years; Lagos – no statistics; Abuja – no statistics.
The reasons for divorce are varied. Sometimes they cite irreconcilable differences. GOD has a better purpose for our homes. GOD wants to keep our marriages new, fresh, satisfying and sustaining. For that to happen, we need to supply the commitments. Number one commitment is closeness. Yes closeness. Husbands and wives must be committed to staying close to each other. Apostle Paul never married, but he was fully invested in the bride of CHRIST the church.
In 2 Corinthians 13:11-13, he pleaded with a particular church when his relationship with that church hits the rocks. He pleaded with them and said,
Our hearts are open to you. There is no lack of love on our own part. Open your hearts to us. This is what you read in 2 Corinthians 7:2 – New Living Translation. Please open your hearts to us, again.
Friends, the point I am making is, learn to open your hearts to each other. When something happens and you discover that his or her heart is being closed, plead with your spouse and say, “Please open your heart to me; we are traveling on a long journey”.
Many relationships are crying for hearts to open. Many marriages fail when spouses close their hearts to one another: affection is cut off, compassion is switched off; people draw away like a planet seeking a new orbit. Do not sell your marriage to the devil; he is the one arch enemy of marriage – especially Christian marriages. He wants to blackmail CHRIST and HIS bride the church.
Commit yourself to work ever closer in your marriage. Intimacy is not a creation of a moment or the product of a ceremony; it is the product of a lifetime relationship. Some marriages are not up to 10 percent intimate. Work on your intimacy and increase the percentage on daily or yearly basis.
- The second commitment is the commitment to communicate: The commitment to communicate. This requires rebranding your tongue and disposition. Do not cause withdrawal of communication by your disposition. You are not the talking type – NO, but you must learn to talk – and talk positively. If you are negative in responding, rebrand. Do not say, why are you asking?
Proverbs 15:1 says
1 A soft answer turns away wrath,
But harsh words cause.
Verse 23 says, 23 Everyone enjoys giving good advice; and how wonderful it is to be able to say the right thing at the right time.
It is foolishness not to communicate. It is equally foolishness to communicate wrongly. Good communication requires wisdom and patience. It requires forethought or intentionality.
I will request my hearers to read John Chapter 4 and see how JESUS our LORD maintained and sustained communication with a hostile woman. The end of that story was that the Samaritan Woman became a powerful witness because she was transformed.
Always think about what you want to say before you say it. Protect your marriage. It is foolishness to talk less and injure or destroy your marriage. Again do not sell your marriage to the devil. Every marriage needs lots of small talk – and sweet talk too.
- The third commitment is commitment to our LORD JESUS CHRIST too. Marriage is GOD’s purpose. It is GOD’s idea. Therefore for it to work you need to commit yourself to CHRIST. He has the blueprint. The road map to a successful marriage is contained in the bible. GOD hates divorce. HE hates violence, whether it is physical or verbal. HE hates hypocrisy, HE hates infidelity, adultery etc. GOD loves submission to one another. GOD has love for one another. GOD hates stinginess. GOD is generous. HE expects husbands and wives to be generous. GOD wants husbands and wives to form the smallest church.
Prayer, bible discussion and fellowship should mark a Christian home. You must be a man or a woman after GOD’s own heart. Draw near to GOD, and HE will draw near to you. As you draw nearer you grow nearer and grow one another.
The happiest couples in the world are those who walk into the future together by faith. Sometimes our lives enter new chapters, but when we stay committed to CHRIST and to each other, we are strengthened in faith, and we experience the fullness of GOD’s promises.
Friends, marriage is the oldest institution GOD put in place. Commitment to keep it new, sustain it and deliver it to the next generation is ours. Remember that marriage does not need redefining. What it requires is commitment to biblical pattern and obedience.
Let us pray.
Heavenly FATHER, The Author of marriage institution, YOU have YOUR reasons for instituting marriages. Grant that broken homes be healed and reconciled. Help YOUR people to commit themselves to intimacy to communicate and to have good relationship with our LORD JESUS CHRIST. Help those who have decided to take some positive test due to the message. Help them. Give them help…in JESUS Mighty Name we have prayed. Amen